Friday, 9 March 2012

Chester FC v Nobody - Free Weekend Preview

Chester face a step up in intensity after Wednesday night's walk in the park against Burscough with a football-free Saturday this weekend.

The Blues will stay top of the league tomorrow by doing diddly squat on a day that Neil Young has described as "not a cup final, this one."

The free weekend means that a couple of those community-type things can take place at the Exacta, and has also freed up boss Young for a trip to Crufts, where he's due to enter his Siberian Husky - affectionately named Pat Cluskey - into the Working Group Competetion.

Other club officials will be spending their day elsewhere.  With a Soul Night being staged at the Exacta tonight, it's a nailed-on certainty that The Dark Owl will spend the day tweeting links to Northern Soul songs while his wife begs him to "just take me shopping, once."

"I'll only hold her purse if I can take my iPod and listen to a bit of Billy McGregor," sulked The Owl.  "We'd better get to kick around the streets of Blacon for a bit afterwards too."

Midfielder Scary Alex Brown has confirmed that he will spend the day stepping up his recent series of terrifying pranks, and Blues legend Harry Hipflask has duly gone into hiding in response to the warnings.
"I'm not taking any risks after last time," whimpered the Coach Captain.  "He called me after 8pm.  He called me after 8pm!  He KNOWS how I feel about people doing that!"

Outside the club, but desperately looking in, Chronicle pseudo-celeb and purveyor of hipster glasses The Tall Peacock is concerned about his feelings of self-worth, as for the first Saturday in ages, Chester's fanbase won't care about his Twitter feed.

"I'm usually the man, come matchday," said a visibly troubled Peacock.  "What am I supposed to do now?  I need a massive scoop to keep people interested. How do I hack Youngy's voicemail?"

Chester return to being an actual football team next weekend when Bradford Park Avenue visit for a game set to be 2012's equivalent of last season's 1-0 win at Skelmersdale, the point at which the title was made absolutely certain.  Three points would leave the Blues far enough clear of the chasing pack to spend their remaining Saturdays participating in community activities, safe in the knowledge that there's no way they could squander such a large lead.

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