Friday 26 October 2012

Chester FC vs Histon FC - Match Pink

Following a weekend of not really doing much, Chester are back in action tomorrow as they take on Cambridgeshire outfit Histon FC.  The Stutes are languishing in the lower reaches of the table, and hopes are therefore high that Young’s men can heap the pressure on league leaders Brackley.

“Last Saturday was well dull” groaned manager Neil Young, when asked how his team had been preparing for the game.

“Danny Howard’s Dance Anthems isn’t really my cup of tea, I’m usually half an hour into my post match interview at that point on a Saturday.”

The Blues were their own worst enemy in their previous home game against Bradford Park Avenue, squandering masses of chances which the strikeforce will be hoping to rectify.  Industrious striker Marc Williams was at the centre of everything good and bad that happened in that game and has reportedly found it hard to shake off the after-effects of the match.

"He got to the ground for training the other day, and got his car into a space perfectly," recounted Young.  "Then, just as it looked like he was gonna make his way inside the ground, he's only gone and tripped over a pothole hasn't he?  Then he wheeled away, arms aloft, looking for a referee."

The latest squad news is that both Michael Powell and his quiff have been transfer listed, due to Powell being a naughty boy.

"It’s a shame his quiff had to get caught in the crossfire but Michael has ignored warnings to stop being silly and it’s finally gone too far,” explained Young.

It was thought that the Blue Chief was willing to hand the gangly scouser another chance but Powell sealed his fate when he clumsily sped off out of the car park after the Bradford game, causing a stone to flick up dangerously, whizzing just past assistant manager Gary Jones’s jowls.

“I would have been a goner, but luckily Iain Howard yelled 'FORE' just in time,” said a relieved Jones.

The board have taken Saturday’s game as an opportunity for the club's third Think Pink day, in aid of Breast Cancer Awareness.  Attendees are encouraged to don pink attire and donate some cash money to the cause.

“Neil was willing to get into the spirit of the day but we felt that he couldn’t be taken seriously if he tried to deliver his trademark half-time froth of rage whilst donning pink antlers, so we vetoed that idea,” retorted chairman The Pilsbury Doughbeard.

There will also be a pink balloon race, with whoever owns the balloon that travels the furthest winning a holiday to Marbella.  Former brainiac Blues striker Chris Simm was seen beaming as he invested in 300 balloons.

"Tactically, I'm also going to tie myself to the balloons and hope that the helium carries me to Marbella itself - double me chances like," grinned Simm.

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