Chester take on Northwich today, needing just a draw to secure the Evo
Stik Northern Premier League top spot following a victory against
Stocksbridge Park Steels on Saturday.
The Stocksbridge game threatened to break ranks with recent Chester
outings. The Blues scored two goals in 12 minutes, fooling fans into
thinking they may just get an entertaining football match finally, but
manager Neil Young quickly marshalled his troops, ensuring that they
didn't go on to bag an 8-0 drubbing.
"Football is art," said Young. "Sure, we could have gone on
battered them, but where's the excitement in that? It's like cinema. I
don't like a film that makes everything easy for me. I want to have to
think about it; I want to have to work for my enjoyment. I want a bit
of drama, a bit of danger, a twist! I want to have mysteries to solve
along the way, then the big reveal and that heart-in-mouth moment before
the hero prevails - that's what it's all about!"
The Blues boss wiped away a tear before finally returning back along
his tenuous thread of thought and concluding "so yeah, that's why we
let 'em have a goal and then hung on for dear life. All part of the
game plan, m'lady."
With the game ending 2-1 to the Blues, attention switched to today's
game with Northwich, and Young was quick to point out that Vics have
the advantage.
"They didn't play on Saturday. Also, we're aiming
to try and win it out at Mickleover just to make it a logistical
headache. Trying to fit 3000 plus into a stadium which holds the same
number of people as your average hot-tub? Be a bit of a laugh wouldn't
it? Also, the Exiles are probably coming today, and they'd be well
upset at having trekked up here for nothing."
"Worth it."
Northwich will be without controversial full back
John Disney, who went down lightly following an altercation with
Michael Powell - a man whose hair has more body than his actual body -
at Victoria Stadium on Boxing Day. Disney has cunningly gotten himself
suspended for the occasion, much to the relief of anyone who cringes at
the embarrassing Twitter exchanges between the former Republic of
Ireland U17 international and those Blues fans who are of the impression
that they can make Disney see the error of his ways by swearing at him
in 140 characters or fewer.
Meanwhile, over on The Scorching Plaza of Blinding Intellgience
(AKA. The Devachats), certain fans are seeking to ship out the current
squad before they've even won us the title.
"You've gotta think
ahead," said G Blocker, Preston Swingball. "This is a rough world, and
it would be remiss of us to allow even a second to pass between us
winning the league and Youngy booting out those who I've deemed aren't
good enough even though I've never watched a Blue Square North game in
my life. There's no time to celebrate, it's not like there's an off
season in which to sort all this out, or anything."
It is unclear which players will be available for the match, with
Chris Simm facing a fight to get his breath back in time, after he left
the pitch winded on Saturday. Christian Smith missed the Stocksbridge
encounter altogether, and was left seething at how he was delivered the
news that he was to be sidelined.
"I'm in the middle of an 83 game streak with Youngy on Draw
Something," explained Smith "Then he draws a shepherd's crook, and the
answer was "DROPPED". I figured it out and got my three coins, but it's
scant consolation even if it did mean I could buy the colour green.
The gaffer's gone too far this time."
A big crowd is expected at the Exacta and, if past form is anything
to go by, you can look forward to the Blues winning the trophy in
Derbyshire next weekend.
100% made up nonsense
2% more reliable a news source than Deva Chat
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