Friday, 8 August 2014

Spending time just being Young

Former Chester FC manager Neil Young has revealed that he's "getting loads done" since his departure from the club midway through last season.

Young left the Blues by mutual consent after making a poor start to the season and after being made to manage whilst Jim Harvey strolled about the place with some non-descript role, which always seemed a bit sinister whatever slant you want to put on it.

"Obviously it was disappointing to leave," said the former Seal King. "But on the bright side, I've finally completed Coolboarders 2 on PS1."

"It took me days, but I eventually landed a 720 Stalefish in the halfpipe, just in time for Mrs Young to demand I take the bins out. She didn't seem to appreciate what I'd just achieved."

Young remains philosophical about the way that it ended with the Blues.

"You can mooch round the house kicking the skirting boards and devouring Chupa Chups, or you can just be happy with the model train set you've now been able to build in the loft," philosophised Young.

"I've made a replica of the Merseyrail set-up. Got some lovely die cast engines and used some green Chupa Chups as trees. Even got the dog to pee on it, so it smells the same as the real thing, too."

Not everyone is convinced that MC Puffer Coat is enjoying his time off however. Journalists Tennis Ball and The Tall Peacock have revealed that they have been receiving increasing numbers of texts and emails from Young.

"Yeah, I even had a voicemail the other day asking why I never want to talk any more," explained the Peacock. "He said I was dead keen when he was manager, but that now it's like I don't even care."

"Then he started doing the trumpet riff from One Less Problem by Ariana Grande feat. Iggy Azalea. Proper odd."

Former assistant Gary Jones has rubbished these claims.

"Nah Youngy's doing fine," bellowed 'Jonesy'. "I was round his the other night for a Scalextrics tournament.
He still puts on a barnstorming evening."

"He does seem to have developed a Chupa Chups addiction though."

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