Chester head into tomorrow’s clash with Mickleover with a refreshed confidence, after Hednesford were surprisingly and hilariously defeated by Marine in midweek. The Blues know that a win would strengthen their title dream and struggling Mickleover present an opportunity for the Blues goal-shy strike force to get back on track.
The focus has fallen upon the Chester FC forwards in recent weeks following a series of spooned chances, with the Evening Leader publishing a startling article featuring Jamie Rainford, who exclusively revealed that the front men want to score goals.
In other revelations, Neil Young will arrive before kick-off, defenders will attempt to keep the ball away from the goal and the word on the street is that the substitutes will go for a light jog and stretch at a mystery point during the Mickleover tie.
“It’s the only way we can keep Wildey happy at the moment, he lives for that clap from the Main Stand when he warms up,” nodded Gary Powell, wearing socks that looked alarmingly like tights.
Meanwhile, The Tall Peacock of the Chester Chronicle - forcing his way through the crowds of screaming women who had turned up at Chronicle HQ hoping to catch a glimpse of his colleague Sharks Prowling - preferred to link up with injured captain George Horan. To the relief of Blues fans, Horan confirmed that he will NOT be panicking following the Hednesford defeat.
“I was getting worried about what our captain felt after Saturday. I was panicking that he was panicking, and that it would make the whole team panic which would then make the fans panic. I’ve not been able to concentrate since. My thanks to George and The Peacock for allaying our fears - I needed this and so did my family,” sighed Exile Kevin Stressman, justifying the article.
Whilst some teams have provided humour with as little as the name of their manager this season, (Peter Rinkcavage of Frickley a prime example) there are no obvious jokes to make about Mickleover boss Dick Pratley.
Mickleover Sports shortened their name from Mickleover Jolly Good Sports in 2004, but maintain an air of sportsmanship not shared by Hednesford Gamesmen. It is expected that no Mickleover player will dive or argue with the ref, whilst manager Pratley is well known for appluading his opposition when they score.
Neil Young meanwhile has introduced Fleetwood's Stefan Cox to his squad;
“He’s a wide man, he’s pacy, quite small, he delivers crosses, he’s unlike anything we currently have,” said Young, of his fourth left winger of the season.
Turning his attention to his opponents, the Blue Chief confessed that he doesn't know a great deal about Mickleover.
“Paddy Cluskey's got a boss tracky from there, though. Give him credit, he wears it well.”