Friday 23 November 2012

Histon FC vs Chester FC - Match Pitch

Chester FC travel to Histon tomorrow in a hastily arranged fixture, primarily intended to taunt Welsh side Colwyn Bay.

Histon have had money troubles of late, but a swift trip to a pay day loans broker has sorted them out for the moment.

"We've gotta pay it back at 7645% APR, so we're hoping Chester bring a few," fretted chairman Rusty Cans.

Histon's ground Bridge Road is also known as the Glassworld Stadium, for sponsorship purposes.  The original deal saw everything is the stadium double glazed, but this stunt was abandonned after winger Theo Ola cut his leg on a smashed corner flag.

Histon almost pulled off a surprise draw at the Exacta earlier in the season, with the Blues requiring a late Antoni Sarcevic goal to win following the team's lacklustre performance.

"The lads just didn't get going, they were lethargic," said Neil Young, flicking through his thesaurus for synonyms for 'lazy'.  "We've gotta make sure we've got a bit of energy about us this time out.  I've stocked up on Sherbet Dib Dabs in order to give the lads a sugar rush - get 'em a bit hyper.  I don't want to be there when they crash though!"

After giving his side a 1-0 win over Gloucester City on Sunday, Nathan Jarman has confirmed to the official website that he is looking to score some more goals.

"See, we're working on making the website more appealing, by bringing you these exclusives," yodelled CFU media gent Jaffa Cakes. "Tomorrow, it's 'John Danby doesn't like conceding goals'. Tune in."

Meanwhile, another trip south means more coach politics for manager Neil Young.

"Wes Baynes almost refused to play on Sunday after he didn't get a window seat, and big George had to turf a few boys off the back row," sighed the Blue Chief.  "I was trying to sort that out, when Sarce got hold of the microphone and did some beatboxing.  Chaos."

New signing Ben Mills is expected to miss the game with a shoulder injury caused by sheer weight of expectation.

A win for Chester will keep them in the hunt for the title, and well placed for when Brackley start behaving themselves and lose a couple of games.

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