Friday, 23 September 2011

Stafford Rangers vs Chester Match Preview

Chester are preparing for tomorrow's game at Stafford with a great deal of confidence, sparked by a five game winning streak in which they haven't conceded a single goal.

And whilst Neil Young is trying to ensure that complacency doesn't set in, Michael Taylor, whose return to the side has coincided with Chester's failure to concede, has taken to training in slippers and a dressing gown, whilst smoking a cigar.

"Clearly I'm the daddy around here" drawled Taylor from behind a pair of aviators and a thick cloud of smoke.

"We concede four goals in one game against Nantwich, then Tay Tay comes back into the line up and BAM!  No goals.  Danby reckons it's all down to him, but the stats don't lie.  Ya get me, bro?"

Meanwhile, upon learning the news that former Blues striker Daryl Clare has left Cambridge by mutual consent, some fans have spied an opportunity for yet another "Bring Back" campaign.

"I don't care if Simmo is on fire, McNeil unplayable at times and our 37 goal striker has returned. I want Daryl" yodelled excitable C Block regular Martyn Beswick.

Blues manager Neil Young admitted that he'd been inundated with requests for the return of Clare, who was on top of his game when he played for Chester 9 (nine) years ago.

"To be honest I had to Google Daryl because I wasn't 100% sure on who he was, but people tell me he scored a lot of goals in the previous decade. I reckon I'll take my chances that after 17 goals in the last five games, our current strike force is probably alright."

In related news, after hearing about Daryl Clare's surge in popularity when he outrageously retrieved a Mars chocolate bar from his sock after netting against perennial strugglers Barnet, it's rumoured that Jamie Rainford is considering storing a Drifter in his sleeve and hoping against hope that he manages to bag a goal before its sell-by date.

Clare played in Chester's last outing to Stafford when Chester won 2-0 in a forgettable FA Cup tie.  Loose cannon Cortez Belle took a break from pole-axing opposition players to score Chester's first and celebrated by managing not to get himself sent off.  Daryl Clare meanwhile missed a first half chance before being replaced by Kevin Rapley, who scored from a Cortez assist within six minutes of coming on.  In terms of games that confirmed Daryl as a legend, this was probably not one of them.

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